Parents never know when the right time is to call a doctor for their infant.  They don’t want to call too early because they are afraid that they might seem overprotective or paranoid. However, if they call too late, they might seem uncaring and neglectful. As a result, parents feel a heightened sense of apprehension when their infant gets sick, especially for the first time.

The first thing all new parents need to realize is that babies get sick, just like children of any age. A sick baby does not mean you are a bad parent. In fact, getting a small cold once in a while helps your baby’s developing immune system become stronger. But any cold or sickness can develop into a difficult situation if not kept under control.

When your baby sickens, try to maintain a normal feeding schedule. There is no problem with breastfeeding your sick baby. In fact, breastfeeding frequently might help your baby get better faster. If you baby is older and is no longer nursing, consider increasing her fluid intake, encouraging your baby to drink water and pure fruit juices.

It is much easier to spot an emergency situation with your child.  In such cases, you should contact your doctor and/or 911 immediately.  Emergency situations are best handled by professionals, so do not try to fix the situation yourself.  There is a possibility that you could make it worse.  Along with poisoning and uncontrollable bleeding, you should also call for emergency help if you child has seizures.  Remember, it is always better to be too cautious rather than not cautious enough.

A fever is often the first sign you receive when your baby is sick. If the fever is above 102 in a baby, you should call the doctor. A higher fever does not mean your baby is necessarily dangerously sick, but your baby’s doctor should know, so that he can advise you on treatment. Another indication that your baby needs to be seen is a sudden, drastic change in appetite. A good rule of thumb is if your baby skips two meals in a row, they need to go to the pediatrician.

Assessing your baby’s mood is another way to determine if they are sick enough to go to the doctor. Of course, a sick baby is not going to be her normal joyful self, but if your baby becomes completely inconsolable, call the doctor. Crying that lasts longer than three hours is a good sign that something more serious is wrong.

Diarrhea that lasts for six or more diapers in a row is a sign of illness, and can lead to dehydration. The same goes for vomiting. It is important to know the difference between vomiting and spitting up. Most babies will spit up, and sometimes they spit up quite a lot of substance, but vomit will be forceful and projectile. As with diarrhea, excessive vomiting can lead to dehydration.

Sometimes, a parent’s intuition is right.  A simple phone call to your pediatrician over something that you feel may be abnormal with your infant is not a bad idea.  Pediatricians are accustomed to dealing with new parents.  It is always better to err on the side of precaution and safety rather than let something more serious happen because you were afraid to make a simple phone call.  A good parent is one who always keeps their child’s health in mind above all else.

To ensure a healthy and proper development for your child, it is important to make sure that they are getting enough sleep. But, as many parents know, some children do not have an affinity towards sleep. At times, they will fight tooth and nail against laying down quietly for the night. Letting your child stay up a little longer can sometimes diffuse their anger, but oftentimes it only leads to the child losing a few hours of sleep that night. This, in turn, can harm your child’s health if done on a regular basis.

How much sleep does a child need? Because your child can function on six or seven hours of sleep, does that mean that he is getting enough? It is important to realize that all children are unique individuals, and what is the required amount of sleep for your child might be entirely different from the right amount of sleep for your best friend’s child.

Babies need significant amounts of sleep, because their bodies are growing and changing at an enormously rapid pace. Generally, during the first six months of life babies will average around ten hours of sleep a night, along with an average of five hours of naps during the day. While these are long periods of sleep, they will include many interruptions for feedings. It is important for parents to feed their babies during the night, as their tiny tummies cannot hold enough food to allow them to sleep through the entire night. At around six months of age they should be encouraged to sleep through the night, because uninterrupted sleep is crucial for a baby’s proper development. At this age naps often are reduced to around three hours. The best way to teach your baby to sleep through the night is to avoid getting them out of bed when they do awaken. Teach your baby to put himself back to sleep without needing you.

Toddlers typically sleep between ten and thirteen hours each night. This also should be uninterrupted sleep, but since this is the time when babies start to actively dream, you can expect to have a dream or two that wakes up your child. It is a good idea to hold and comfort your child after a scary dream. This is also the time when many children drop their afternoon naps. If your child stops showing signs of needing a nap, it is fine for them to drop their nap routine. As your child begins the preschool years, they will still need around ten hours of sleep each night.

There are not any rules that can be applied to every child. It is up to the parent to notice patterns with their child. This includes their sleep pattern. If observed closely, children tend to display signs of tiredness when they get drowsy. Parents should take heed of these signs and recognize that time as the normal bedtime for their child. Of course, there will be times when this bedtime will not be able to be achieved, but parents should make a considerable effort to make it as routine as possible. Consistent sleep patterns lead to healthy sleep patterns. Bedtime rituals, as a form of relaxation, are also a great aid in assisting in your child’s healthy sleep pattern.

When your toddler goes off to pre-school or play dates, do you believe that he/she is safe?  While you’re out grocery shopping or at home doing the laundry, is it possible that your toddler could be being physically and/or emotionally harmed?  Would you know the signs that may indicate that your toddler is being bullied?

In 2005, a national survey reported that an astonishing 63% of children ages four through ten say they are or have been bullied by other children of the same or similar age.  The same survey found that only 18% of these children’s parents or caretakers knew or suspected that their child was being bullied.

Bullying is defined as one person using his/her age, size, and aggressive nature to hurt and control other, vulnerable children.  Bullies are people who have a very poor self-esteem and dominate others in a futile attempt to increase their sense of self-worth. Bullies can be any age, gender, or ethnic class.  Young bullies, if their behavior is unchecked, become older bullies.  In children, the psychiatric diagnosis of Conduct Disorder is just the beginning of the development of cruel, dominating behavior, refusal to follow social and family rules, substance abuse beginning at a young age, gang affiliation, school suspensions and learning disorders, and a lack of remorse for their actions.  As these children reach age 18, they are diagnosed with the Antisocial Personality Disorder; in most cases, this diagnosis results in criminal behavior.  An estimated 89% of prison inmates in this country are ASPD.  This personality disorders are not “curable;” it’s indicative of deeply-ingrained personality characteristics.

The following is a checklist of symptoms that your toddler may exhibit if he/she is being bullied:

- Depression; apathy, irritability, agitation, insomnia, low frustration tolerance, inability to concentrate, bed-wetting and lack of appetite.

- Fearfulness; reluctant to attend pre-school or play dates, crying, feigning illness.

- Questions about “What would happen if…” concern about what happens in jail, “What if I told you a secret,” and “If I don’t like Tommy, do I have to play with him?”

- Physical signs that seem suspicious; unexplained cuts, scrapes and bruises.  When asked, the child makes up a story that isn’t consistent with the injury.

- Missing personal items; the child comes home without his/her lunch box, loss of small change, missing clothing, games, and toys.

- Regressed behavior; acting younger than his/her age, speaking “baby talk,” clinging to parents, urinating or defecating in clothes, and wanting to eat baby food.

If your toddler exhibits any or all of these systems, the first thing you should do is ask the child if he/she is being bullied.  Make sure the child understands that he/she is not in trouble, and that it’s okay to tell this secret no matter if the bully has threatened further harm if the bullying is revealed. Reassure your child that everybody, including the bully will be safe.

Naturally, if your child is being bullied at pre-school or at play dates, you’ll want to know where were the supposedly supervising parents or teachers?  Once your child has divulged the secret, you have every right to ask the adults why they failed to supervise what was happening at their home or at pre-school.  Don’t send your child back to a home where adult supervision is so lacking that he/she is being hurt.  If your child is being harmed in a pre-school, speak to the owner or top-level manager about the lack of supervision by the teachers.  If you get no satisfactory answers, remove your child from the school and report the harm done to your child to Child Protection Services.

Ages ago, the school of thought on bullying was “Fight it out and get over it”. Not so anymore. There are too many dangers that can’t be solved by the child standing up on his own against the stereotypical schoolyard bully.  You have to stand up for your child and show him that you will support him no matter what.  Children need to know they can come to you with anything, no matter how horrible it might seem in their mind. You are their hero; you are the one who is ultimately going to save the day and keep them safe. Don’t let them down.

Every generation has their share of challenges, each generation believing they had it worse than the one coming after. The snow was deeper and the hikes to and from school longer (uphill both ways, mind you!). We didn’t have an easy life or the new generation doesn’t have one that’s hard enough. But for the smaller children growing up, they have nothing else to compare their lives to but the here and now. It is toddlers’ innocence and wide-eyed wonder at the world that give us hope for tomorrow.

Little kids, especially barely verbal kids, watch and listen to everything. All kinds of things fascinate them; the graceful motion of goldfish, the gentle waving of tall grasses, the color yellow, and the bouncing of a beach ball. All the things adults take for granted, toddlers find endlessly amazing. They believe everything we tell them; they have no concept of lying, or even fanciful jest. Myths, childhood legends, make-believe, wonderful fantasies of all sorts and even bogeymen that lurk in their closets at night are all real to them. Kids believe it just because we say it. Like the sleeping puppy, their total absence of guile seems to last such a short time! This innocence seems to vanish within the first few years of their lives, never to be reclaimed.

What takes the place of childish innocence? We can only hope that it is wisdom. As children learn the ways of the world, this knowledge can sometimes be disappointing. There’s no such thing as Santa Claus or Superman. The tiny puppy grew into a big dog that bites if its ears are yanked. Grandmother died – she isn’t “sleeping.” And there are monsters, but they don’t live in the closet at night; they are teachers and babysitters and the nice man next door who has some strange pictures of naked kids.

Life is the wind that erodes the soft rock of innocence. Over time, kids tend to start accepting the world as it is, not as it should be. A child’s reasoning becomes things are what they are. Unfortunate events are reduced to their simplest forms: a tornado blew our house down; some people from another place didn’t like us so they blew up our buildings; people get sick and go to live with God. Much of this is the way we as parents handle life ourselves. Do we offer simple stories to try to explain events and situations? Or do we tell the child what adults understand to be the truth and let them figure it out from there?

Strange, isn’t it? Even when they know the truth, little kids still have the wisdom to tell it like it is and cope with it, whatever “it” may be. They don’t have ulcers, drink too much alcohol, or brood about ways to take revenge on someone who hurt them. They trust that they’ll have food to eat and clothes to wear. They don’t worry about paying the mortgage; they just put their toys away before bed like Mommy said. As adults, it seems incredible that we too were once as innocent as our youngest children are now. Then life happened – so did divorce, addiction, unemployment, war and illness.

So many times, it is all too easy to sigh and say that this is how life has to be for our children too. But even when Pandora released evil upon the world, hope remained in the box. Maybe our children will inherit a better world; we can certainly do our best to hope for that. Not everyone surrenders the innocence of youth and some folks are lucky enough to maintain a small portion of it as they age. If our toddlers can do this without becoming bitter or jaded by the worries of the world, then they have gained true wisdom.

Toddlers are basically fearless.  They have no scruples about touching things, picking up objects that should be left alone, and putting items into their mouths that would make an adult cringe. Fortunately, most of these dismaying habits cause no harm to the toddler or kids wouldn’t live past kindergarten!

But there are some practices that are dangerous, even fatal, for toddlers.  Outdoors and indoors, toddlers need supervision to insure their safety.  With their innocent sense of immortality, toddlers don’t know what’s safe and what will hurt them, so adults must stay vigilant on their behalf.

Inside your home, everybody knows about covering electric sockets, stoves, and keeping chemicals and medicines out of children’s reach.  But your home is beset with dangers you probably haven’t thought about.  You know how dogs like to drink out of toilets?  So do toddlers!  There must be something innately fascinating about toilet bowls that lures dogs and children.  Try keeping the lid down and the bathroom door shut.  Your dog may be unhappy, but your child will be germ-free.

Toddlers are also drawn to pet food.  Fish food, bird seed, dried dog food – toddlers, with their perfectly reasonable logic, think that if it’s okay for the pets to eat, it must be okay for them to eat!  After all, pets eat human food, so why can’t we eat animal food?  Try gently reminding your toddler that animal food is only okay for animals, not for people.  Be prepared for that ever-popular question, “But WHY?”

There are dozens of choking hazards in your home.  Rubber bands, paper clips, twisty-ties from bread wrappers, coins, even food items like chips and crackers can be hazardous.  If you were to interview a hundred ER physicians, most of them would tell you stories about clashes between little kids and household items.  A classic story is the physician who removed a nickel from the nose of a five-year-old!  This is a good time to teach your toddler that loose items and their orifices isn’t a good match.

Outside, toddlers think nothing of touching and/or picking up things out of curiosity that would make an adult shriek!  Bugs, worms, plants – nothing’s safe from a four-year-old sleuth.  If you live in the south, you know that Mistletoe grows abundantly on trees much like moss.  Kids are drawn to this pretty parasite and have no idea that, if ingested, it’s deadly poison!  Jimsonweed is a common, rather pretty, roadside herb that causes intense hallucinations and psychotic behavior if chewed.  These are just two examples of common plant hazards; teach your child never to put anything in his/her mouth that you haven’t okayed.  Bugs are generally harmless if eaten, but it’s not a good idea to take chances.

Teach your toddlers never to touch a snake, lizard, turtle, toad, or any other creature of the outdoor world unless an adult is present. While most of these critters are harmless, toddlers don’t know a garden snake from a copperhead!  Alligator snapping turtles can whack off a toddler’s tiny finger in a split second.  If you live in a rural area, it’s imperative that you teach your child to leave outdoor citizens alone!  If you live near a beach, teach your toddler that sea urchins, crabs, and jellyfish can hurt them despite their harmless and fascinating appearances.

Endless curiosity is part of the charm of watching a child grow up. Through children, we get a second chance to see the world through new eyes. Toddlers, in turn, get to see the world through adult eyes as we teach children how to temper curiosity with caution and point out that sometimes, fun things can be harmful.  Be patient, let children learn, and be there to keep them from getting into trouble with their explorations.  You will always worry about your children, no matter what age they might be, but for the time being, you can do your best to show them the difference between safe and sorry.

Alfred Adler, a contemporary of two other well-known psychiatrists, Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung, had some very interesting theories about family and social interaction. Primarily, Adler was fascinated with human nature acted on in terms of social interest and in fact, the term “social interest” can be traced directly back to Adler and his concepts.  Social interest, as defined by Adler, is a person’s willingness to contribute to those around him or her.

Building upon his theory of social interest, Adler took the concept a step further and studied the meaning of birth order. Adler focused upon sibling interactions and psychological aspects of birth order.  Thinking now about your own family make-up – both your own nuclear family and your family as its composed today, consider Adler’s proposed five psychological birth order positions:

- The oldest child tends to be analytical, detailed, a methodical; this child values control.  He/she sets the example for younger children.  They are used to being “number one.”

- Second-born children are often in competition with the oldest child; if the oldest is good at math, the second-born will ignore math and find something that he/she excels with in a manner superior to the talents of the oldest child.

- Middle children tend to be the family diplomats.  They dislike conflicts and seek fairness and justice.  They’re “people pleasers.”

- Youngest born are usually excitement seekers who crave attention so they won’t be “left behind” in family activities and the atmosphere as a whole.

- Only children never have to compete and share within the family.  They grow up accustomed to having their own way.  They set high goals for themselves and keep a polite distance from others.

Considering Alfred Adler’s concept of birth order, how does this work within your family?  Can you see your children taking on these birth order roles?  What’s the family atmosphere in your home?  Can you see your child or children working towards Adler’s concept of healthy social interest?  Most importantly, does the birth order of your children – from the oldest to the youngest toddler – seem to make a difference in how your child’s character develops?

When you consider the birth order of your children, keep in mind that several extraneous factors influence the children’s behavior; the age differences of the children, handicaps or disabilities with any child, and the gender of the children.  Adler never meant for birth order characteristics to be written in stone; there are always outside factors that will make a difference in their birth order behavior.

Parents are always looking for answers about why their children behave the way they do. Adler’s theories help provide some answers when it comes to understanding a child’s motivation. Of course, Adler’s theories of birth order won’t be the be-all and end-all of explaining social interactions, as there are far too many other factors involved, but birth order and personality is a starting point to understanding behavior, one that can provide valuable insight.

Just because she is a baby does not mean that her eye care is not just as important. From the moment the sperm fertilized the egg, her body has been forming and growing. In a matter of weeks, her eye begins to develop and continues this development up until around the age of three. At three years of age her vision is the same as an adult.

Birth is a hectic time for a baby. She has left the protected womb to venture outside into a world of flashing lights and strange sounds. The pediatric team will evaluate her for any visible abnormalities. If there are signs of a defect with her vision, or a hereditary defect, the pediatrician will recommend further testing. Eye exams are given periodically, six months, three years and then every year after five, to ensure that the eye is developing normally and that there are no obvious visual problems.

When the child becomes of age to begin school, often the teacher notices if the child has problems with his or her vision. It might come through a reluctance to try to read the blackboard or squinting to see words printed on a piece of paper. The teacher either will then usually talk with the parents about the problem or will send a note home advising of the need for an eye exam. The actual eye exam may be different from that of an adult. If the child cannot read, then shapes will take the place of the more common letters. The exam is a little bit more difficult for the eye care professional because of the communication level. If a vision problem is detected, the eye doctor may or may not recommend glasses. Often a vision problem is just age associated and the doctor may elect to wait to see if the child outgrows it. Otherwise eyeglasses are prescribed.

The eyes and vision is a valued asset. From the moment of birth, they are our windows to the outside world. It is through them that we know colors and brightness. A baby’s eyes will develop and absorb the outside world. The parents, teachers and doctors will monitor the child in order to assure that the eyes and vision are working properly without defect. Eye exams are essential for everyone.

When you see a small child that is constantly somber and subdued, it may make you think of a depressed adult. The next thought that comes into your mind will probably be that a child from a stable home situation can have nothing to be depressed about. But the sad, and often misunderstood, fact about depression is that many cases start in childhood.

In order to understand childhood depression, you must have a definition of depression in mind. Many people say, “I am so depressed” when they have a particularly disappointing or sad day, but there is a major distinction between these momentary, fleeting feelings of sadness and genuine clinical depression. Clinical depression is a continual, pervasive sense of sadness, dread, and anxiety. When left untreated, depression can lead to serious health issues and even thoughts of suicide.

There is a general feeling that children should be happy as long as all of their physical and emotional needs are tended to at home.  But many people do not realize the daily struggles that children have outside of the home. The feeling of helplessness overtakes many children because they do not have the capabilities to understand the world around them.  With the overwhelming need to please authority figures while at the same time fitting in with their peers, children have many internal struggles that may often lead them into a feeling of depression.

Depression, while exhibited as an emotional response, has a chemical cause that can and should be treated. While scientists have very limited understanding about the function of the brain, they do realize that certain chemicals can become imbalanced in the brain, leading to depression. The treatment for depression often involves medications and relaxation techniques that balance out these chemicals.

The most important thing a parent can do to help their child battle depression is to be aware of the risk their child faces and knowledgeable about the symptoms they might see in their children. Children who are depressed will have persistent feelings of sadness or be constantly irritable. They will often express or exhibit a low self-image. This is often exhibited in statements such as “I’m so dumb” that seem to come out of nowhere.

Children who are depressed will find it difficult to concentrate on their schoolwork or other responsibilities. They may loose sleep, or begin to sleep too much. Their appetite will either increase or decrease dramatically. The same occurs in their level of activity.

Depressed children often exhibit physical symptoms, such as a persistent stomachache or headache that seems to have no trigger. Other changes in the child’s normal routine or behavior can be signs of depression. While the depression may be triggered by an obvious event, such as the death of a relative or sudden move, if the symptoms persist for an extended period of time, it becomes dangerous.

If your child shows signs of depression, the best thing to do is to call a professional immediately.  This professional can either be your family doctor or even a school counselor.  If these people do not have experience working with depressed children, then they can recommend another professional who does have experience.  Medications and aggressive therapy may be suggested treatments for your depressed child, but it will be worth it in the long run.  Getting involved in your child’s life is the best thing a parent can do in order to contribute to a happy childhood.

All marriages experience problems and marriage issues because life has difficulties and issues. It is a simple fact of life that problems will occur, but the difference between a couple that stays together and a couple that divorces is the manner in which the couple gets through the marriage issues. Some will fight it out, others will ignore it and others will discover a way to constructively get through the problem. Regardless of the decisions made in marriage, marriage issues will occur in some form or another.

Many people fight it out when they have conflicts or marriage issues. For some couples, the best possible option is to yell and scream at the top of their lungs until the problem has been “shouted out”. This can be therapeutic if standards and boundaries are set.

If a conflict becomes physical, however, it will quickly turn dangerous for both parties and can serve as a “deal breaker” for the entire relationship. Physical conflict is something that should never occur under any circumstances. Divorce marriage is certainly an aspect to consider if physical conflicts begin to take place. Divorce marriage will quickly remove the participants from the situation and possibly save lives.

In other cases, couples choose to ignore the marriage issues and bury them. This generally unhealthy approach can lead to problems down the road, escalating the original conflict. One thing piles up on top of another and, before the participants are even aware of what is happening, there is an explosion of catastrophic impact.

For some reason, people seem to want to test the bonds of their relationships by keeping conflicts and issues hidden. Burying concerns in a marriage will certainly test the bonds, but they will inevitably bring about a breaking point as they grow and boil to the surface. Instead, they should be approached as they occur and a discussion should take place.

Other people will seek out marriage counseling help for their marriage issues. This is viewed differently by many couples. Some will view counseling as a last resort, while others will view it as a first call. The idea behind marriage counseling is that a third party will hear the problems of the couple and be able to offer qualified objective advice. Many people put a high value on this type of help, but others find it to be redundant because the counselor does not “know” the couple.

Regardless of the type of conflict resolution used to help with marriage issues, they will rear their ugly head during the course of a marriage. There are many books and other materials that are designed to help couples with conflict resolution skills. Some may turn to therapy, while others ignore the issue. Still others shout the issue out until it is apparently drained from their systems.

The reality about issues in marriage is that they will occur, but the true challenge comes in the overcoming of these issues. If a couple is strong and open, the ability to conquer marriage issues will be present. If they hide issues, however, the ability to overcome the marriage issues may be weakened. Over time, marriage issues will begin to represent the various ups and downs that all married people experience throughout their lives.

The marriage debate that currently dominates our society is one referring to homosexual marriage. This debate, while it may seem to be unique, is taking place all over the world and is certainly nothing new. The debate is almost entirely about the terminology of defining marriage. Religious groups consider marriage as a contract between a man and a woman, whereas other groups consider a broader definition. The only certainty in the debate is that it will likely continue for a great length of time.

One fact that is constantly presented by the conservative side is that marriage is on the decline and more people are getting divorces. They claim that this is a direct result of global moral decay. While one in two couples in the United States get a divorce, the rate is different in the rest of the world. Stats from Germany, for example, have the divorce rate sitting at about two or three hundred couples out of every thousand. Canada’s divorce stats are slightly higher than that, while Italy’s statistics tend to be the lowest in the European Union at around fifty couples out of every thousand.

The divorce arguments factor in to what conservatives in North America consider to be moral decay. The conservatives use this argument to explain why homosexual marriage and abortion are “on the rise”. The United States conservatives have elected to blame those two social issues for the perceived social decline in marriage values without actually looking for causes. Relationships between parents and children are, for example, often centralized because of parents splitting up or because of a lack of role models from both genders. Conservatives often use statistics in terms of child relationships when it comes to homosexual marriage.

The reality that lies somewhere behind all of the assumptions in regards to marriage sex or gender issues is quite different than what the conservatives are using as ammunition for their debates. Instead, the existence of two role models is of certain importance. The marriage sex or gender of those role models, however, is not as important. There are no studies to prove that children of same sex parents or experience any deficiency in their life.

While conservatives attempt to push the marriage debate and their view on various social issues, it is actually a social-economic climate issue that is largely to blame for the breakdown of the American family. As both parents in a home need to work to support children, the time that the child has with those parents is significantly diminished. The time that the couple has for one another is equally diminished. This leads to various workplace affairs and other social issues that are in direct response to marriage breakdowns. Marriage licenses are still actively being rejected to otherwise loving people that just happen to be the same gender, while in other places marriage licenses are granted to those that will work fifty hours a week and will barely form a family unit.

In light of the plethora of misinformation that is given in mindless arguments, it is important to realize that there are standards to uphold. These standards are not entirely based on political leanings or religious viewpoints. They are, in fact, set forth based on facts and compassionate, tolerant behavior. No marriage debate should take the reigns of our responsibility as a society to uphold its values.